Verifying references

Today my agency asked for the phone number and email of my manager that wrote me my reference. They wanted to make sure it was real and not altered. I gave it to them and asked them not to reveal it was for a job in Saudi.

After lunch time, my assistant manager came to me to tell me she received a phone call about the reference. We have a relationship where we can joke with each other so she said “boy, I could have screwed you and said ‘I never wrote such a reference!'”. Then she started to ask questions about the job I am seeking. I tried to change the subject and distract her with jokes. It worked for a few minutes but then the questions started again. I skipped around the truth and said it was a temporary job in a level 3 because I miss critical patients.

I did not mind her asking but I wish the unit’s biggest rumor creator was not in the room at that time. I am now envisioning what rumor Miss Gossip will start upon hearing I requested a reference for a new job. The night shift is about to have FOUR open positions while day shift currently will have three openings soon. I will give plenty of notice if I leave in January, but I do not want the staff knowing due to fears they will treat me harsher after they know. Maybe I am being paranoid. I am worried about the negative things they will say when they learn I am leaving. I hope they fill the positions before then.

I have no control over that comes out of the mouths of my coworkers, but I can control how I react. I must realize the only thing that will be hurt by her gossip is my ego. I need to practice meditation to help me cope with my stress.

“Slander cannot destroy an honest man; when the flood recedes the rock is there.”- Chinese proverb

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